Mon 10 Mar 2014: Time to tell the team

After a weekend of phone calls, parental vist, and generally coming to terms with the situation, it was time to head in to work on the Monday morning.  I'd been off for over a week and people were wondering what was going on with me.  I had told Barry on the phone, but I hadn't seen anyone else to speak to.

                   This isn't my scan image, but it looks very similar to mine.

I arrived at work and called everyone together who was in the offices and warehouses.  With the aid of a flip chart I stood in front of 20-25 people and told them the news.  I drew a picture of the scan and explained, best as I could, what my diagnosis was.  Obviously there was a stunned silence, followed by tears form some people, and shock and horror all round!  Now I didn't really know much about brain tumours, but I was learning fast.  I also didn't really know what exactly was going to happen, but I did know that I was signed off work for the foreseeable future.  I had been told I had to concentrate on getting better, and work would have to look after itself!  I did my best to explain, and lots of people were amazed by my frankness.  Looking back I may have been rather brutal about it but I just wanted to get the facts as I knew them out as widely as possible.  I think that is unusual in itself, and Barry, my co-director has regularly commented on how incredible I was to stand up and tell the news.  I won't kid you, I was choking up, but I was determined to help everyone else deal with the news by being strong myself.

One of my senior managers came for a private chat and couldn't hold back the tears.  There was lots of man hugging going on, and everyone dealt with it in their own way.  Quiet determination, through to toal panic, just about covers it!

There was nothing much I could do to change anything so the best course of action is to do what you are told and get on with it.  Which is what I did...